Nothing to Fear, but Fear Itself

Two things recently inspired me to explore the subject of fear. First, was a very inspirational team call led by my colleague, Wendy Stevens. She invited us to identify our fears and where they come from. After the call, the chatter in my head went something like this. "Hmmm, I don't really have any fears. I mean not really. There is dying, but we all die and I've accepted that, right? There is risk of failing, but I'm realistic about that, right? I won't fail anyway, right?" Then, guillotine dropped! Scary movies!!!! That's it, I'm afraid (and I do mean deathly afraid) of scary movies! Which, ties in perfectly with my second inspiration -- Halloween.

My son, Winston, recently went to the library and checked out some spooky kid's movie. I sit down to watch a bit to make sure it is not too scary for him just the next day after this fear exploration exercise has commenced. Well, the screechy music starts and some horrible man with scary makeup comes onto the screen and that does it. I'm terrified. I can't keep any reactions to myself, proceed to get flustered and shut off the TV...to Winston's amazement and dismay. He asks me why I'm afraid and I try to tell him that the music is scary and the man is scary and he just keeps asking me why they are scary. Now, up to this point, I have welcomed all bugs, lizards, goo and other reaction-drawing, creepy things that little boys like. I've given Winston the chance to decide for himself about how he feels. Not this time. I projected all my terror on him right then and there. Which, I paid for that night at 2am when he came screaming into my bed about how scared he was.

Well, this comes right back to Wendy's point. At some time in our lives, a setting has been made on our personal thermometers regarding myriad topics. Her example was about how her dad said that the only people who could make more that $200,000 per year were doctors and lawyers. She didn't become a doctor or lawyer, so she had to reset her thermostat to exceed that income. I feel bad that I may have put a setting on Winston's scary movie thermometer. So, to rectify the situation, I'm going to watch a few nail biters and sit down with him to see what happens at the end of "Goosebumps Chillology." Afterward, I'll tell him there is nothing to fear, but fear itself.